Carnie's Comments
It's time to share the best of the best from the Twitterati on Twitter Tuesday.
Here's a guy who writes, "Sorry I'm late but, in my defence, American Pie was on the radio and I had to stay in the car."
This gal shares, "My husband always orders two desserts to taste and gives me the one I like best. I think he read the fine print on this marriage."
I like this, "How old am I? Well, I grew up in a world with pastel coloured toilets, avocado green appliances and shag carpets."
A friend of mine Tweets, "I might be annoying but at least I don't add 'LOL' to every message."
Here's a dad who shares, "My son has so many stuffed toys on his bed, he only has about a third of it to sleep on. So, basically, he's prepared for marriage."
Here's a mom who says, "I keep hearing it takes a village to raise a child. Do they just show up or is there a number to call? It's been 24 years. I think maybe they can't find me."
And one more from a middle-aged funny lady I follow who Tweets, "I'm at that age where it's considered rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don't have enough for everyone."